Day 356: Solstice
We had a tender little gathering on Solstice eve, filled with good food, laughter, bedroom dancing, and game playing. Then a group of us walked over to the annual Winter Solstice Puppet Show, one of my absolute favorite Portland events. It was as special as ever. After, Wyatt, Jessika, and I had a little letting go ritual to end the night. It was all so perfect, and now I feel ready to welcome back the light.
Day 357: crafting, good food, and preparation for the days to come. Oh, and a Ryan Gosling marathon.
Day 358: Cooking and baking!! Today I fried up so many latkes in preparation for Chrismukkah tomorrow. And soon will be baking chocolate chunk cookies and maybe some toasted coconut shortbread. And probably more movie watching and good food. I really love this time of year and the break from work/school. I am doing my best to make every day count in ways that are meaningful to me as 2012 comes to an end.
- slept in
- wrote a really long, delightful letter
- worked on my embroidery project
- cooked a delicious curry
- finished season 2 of game of thrones
I love a Wednesday with no homework involved!!
Today self-care looked like dancing in the kitchen to Beyonce jams while baking biscuits. And then taking a plate full of said biscuits to a lovely birthday brunch for a dear friend.
It also looked like finishing up the majority of my class assignments (only 1 left!), making matzoh ball soup to kick the last dregs of this cold out of my system, and baking the best chocolate chunk cookies ever. I even managed to watch a movie! I love weekends.
I’m so looking forward to school being done tomorrow for the term, and for all of the crafting, cooking, reading, and movie watching that I will accomplish in December!
Prepping for the upcoming holiday: baked a gluten-free cake and prepped veggies for farfel. More time in the kitchen, clearing my head, doing what I love to do. So looking forward to queer Passover this year!
Made an amazing diner for myself, with enough leftovers for lunches for the rest of the week. One of the things I’m going to work hard on for the next month is cooking more. I realized that cooking for myself was one of the first things to go out the window when school and work got to be too much. I ate out so much last quarter, and spent a lot of money doing so. I know that I do have to cut myself some slack here and there, but it is one of those things that I’m really going to work on, especially since cooking is so grounding for me.
Act of self-love: Shower your friends with the love and recognition they deserve
My housemate Wyatt got a new job that he’s really excited about. My friend Michelle and I made him a special surprise dinner to celebrate. Here’s some photographic evidence of the feast we had:
oven roasted brussel sprouts
swiss chard with bacon
mashed potatoes with bacon
and not pictured, berry compote with vanilla icecream
It was so fun to cook with Michelle and to collaborate on this surprise for one of my dearest friends. And it was damn good, too.
Also on Saturday I celebrated my body by going to my first Wreckers practice. I loved every minute of it. Looking forward to having my weekends full of skating for the foreseeable future! Some fatshion february evidence of my skating outfit.
I’m realizing that my weekends are getting so jam-packed with so many things, that I’m not able to document what I’m doing as much as I’d like. I’m going to try to be better about it, but I also think it’s important to just be present and in the moment, so I might fall behind now and again. And that’s ok.
Saturday, February 11th. Probably one of the absolute best days I’ve had in recent memory. Full of self-care, self-love, intention, tenderness, hotness, fun, and joy. I feel like I want to write it all down and share it, but I also want to just preserve it in my memory, for me alone.
I’ll share a few highlights:
- Joined the Wreckers with a friend. Some serious body love right there. I’m so looking forward to skating regularly and playing derby again. For fun. I’m also so unbelievably excited about the friendship that is forming and I’m excited to get to do this with someone I totally adore and enjoy.
- Co-created a large scale valentine for planned parenthood. I’m not big on valentine’s day in general, but I had the opportunity to work on this project, and it felt really good to give some love to something that I really believe in and support.
- Witnessed a beautiful, hot pink sunset with arms slung around each other. An unspeakably joyful shared moment. More of those, please.
- Went to a queer play party. My first in portland (I’ve only been to a handful in general). Three of my friends organized it and I volunteered at the door for a couple of hours. It was like nothing I’ve ever seen before. There were so many people, and everyone seemed really happy to be there and the range of folks in attendance was just wild. Ugh, I can’t wait for it to happen again. I’m pretty shy, and had no expectations for the night, but I left so happy and sore. And that’s all I’ll say about that. I also wore an outfit that I felt really good about. I felt really fucking hot, to be honest.
Full evidence here.
Finished the planned parenthood valentine and went to a lovely potluck. The food was out of this world. I’ll be dreaming about it for a long time. I made my favorite beet dish. I feel some kind of way about beets. The people were so great and sweet and I didn’t feel awkward at all, which is rare for me.
Cooking and sharing food. Two of the surest ways to get back to myself. To feel grounded about who I am in this body.
self-care goal: move your body
This weekend, I really tried to focus in on moving my body in intentional and motivating ways. Movement is one of the ways I work through things, and coming off a very emotional week where I was processing a lot, I needed to dedicate some time to getting into my body and out of my head.
Saturday I went to derby class again. It was even better this time. I know I said this last week, but going again was such a good reminder to me for how present and in my body I am when I’m skating. I’m pretty sure my friend and I are going to join the Wreckers, the Rose City Rollers recreational league. I’m fairly confident that I do not want to be a full-on bouting rollergirl again, but I do really miss the sport. I think the rec league sounds really fun and would be a good challenge for me. It would also have me skating regularly, which I’ve clearly discovered is something I want to be doing. Anyway, orientation is next week, so I’ll know more then. It’s also super fun and motivating to have a friend to do this with.
Also, my thighs are so sore today in that really delicious way that I just love. More of that, please.
Today was so unbelievably sunny and dare I say it, warm out. I was swamped with homework but I did manage to take a break and enjoy the weather. I took the teeny tiny out for a walk to enjoy the sunshine. It was short, but being out in the fresh air was energizing. It definitely helped me clear my head and it was good to stretch my legs after skating.
My housemate and I also made delicious treats to take to a super bowl party. We made jalapeno poppers with bacon and those amazing rice crispy treats again. Then we spent the afternoon watching football and Madonna at halftime with a roomful of sweet folks and amazing food. My friend cooked ribs and chicken that were out of control good. Yum!
Now we have chile verde on the stove making the house smell amazing. Can’t wait to have it for lunch tomorrow!
Also, two fatshion february posts! Saturday and Sunday.
Act of self-love: feed yourself. well.
Today I cooked up a storm instead of doing all of the reading I should have been doing for class (I’ll get to it eventually, I swear). Sometimes, (no wait, always) sustenance wins. And I mean the kind of cooking that feeds not only you and your friends,but also your soul. The kind of food that makes you excited, that you can’t wait to make again because it is just that good. The kind of cooking that will keep me sane for the week. Through work and school and appointments and bills and the daily grind that gets in the way of me eating as well as I should.
This evening, I made myself a yummy dinner with enough leftovers for lunch tomorrow. Lamb kabobs (pre-marinated, but still), sauteed fennel and quinoa. lamb and fennel are on the list of foods my acupuncturist recommended, and I’m trying to incorporate these foods into my diet as much as possible.
I also made stuffed cabbage with my housemate:
mostly for freezing so that I’ll have something to fall back on. I used the recipe from smitten kitchen with some tweaks from how my mom makes it (I didn’t have her recipe on hand). The rolls turned out pretty good, but I think next time I’ll just get my mom’s recipe. It’s a nostalgia thing.
I really love cooking with friends. It’s one of my favorites. My housemate and I are a really good team, and he’s one of my favorite people to cook with (and not just because he let’s me be the kitchen top). I want to spend more time in the coming months cooking with others. It’s such a great way to do self-care together.
We also made the most amazing rice crispy treats ever. i’m not even kidding about it, they are out of control good.
sea salt brown butter crispies
Cooking is my ultimate self-care. It would be at the top of my list. hands down. And I just haven’t done enough of it lately. I’m working on changing that in the month to come.
Act of self-love: donate your time to something you believe in
Today I spent the majority of my day volunteering at a secret cafe fundraiser for NOLOSE (a volunteer-run organization dedicated to ending the oppression of fat people and creating vibrant fat queer culture). I believe we raised over $600!
I was a kitchen helper/cook, and I worked with my fermentation and pickle club collaborators (as well as many other amazing volunteers) to feed almost 30 guests at the cafe.
The event was amazing. Everyone worked so hard and well together. People were smiling all day, even when it got really busy. The food was delicious, beautiful, plentiful. I think everyone went home happy and satisfied.
It felt so incredible to be a part of this event. To put my skills to use, to see so many people really enjoying what we were serving them, to work with some really special, talented folks.
This is what fat community feels like, looks like. I am honored to be a part of it.