day 193.

I haven’t written here in weeks.I even missed the half way point milestone (day 183) that I swore I’d post about. I started my summer term and it has felt like my life has gotten away from me a bit. I have been basically living in a world of homework and deadlines and so much reading for the past three weeks. It’s kind of unreal. Plus the lack of reliable internet has made things extra difficult. But the internet sitch has been fixed, my term is done in a week (and then I start another a few days later, but only one class instead of two), and I feel like I can start getting back to updating more regularly.

All that said, I have been practicing self-care on the regular. Especially with summer finally here, I have been treating myself really well and prioritizing certain activities to help me get through the term at school and make the most of the limited “me” time I have right now. Also, since school is a major priority and going to grad school has been such an act of self-love for me, I feel like pouring myself into it and giving it my all is some of the best self-care I can do. But trips to the river, playing in the park, and epic days of berry picking and jam making certainly don’t hurt either.

strawberries and lavender picked on Sauvie Island

lavender farm on Sauvie Island

strawberry lavender jam

little dog in a big park

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day 100.

So, I wasn’t going to write here today as I’ve been taking a bit of space from the internet (some self-care right there) but then I realized that today, Monday, April 9th, is the 100th day of this project!! And that just feels like a milestone I couldn’t pass on.

Today marked the second week of my new term at school, which meant a 13+ hour day between work, school, and commute. I’m surprised to say that it went really well and I don’t feel like I want to tear my hair out or cry or anything of the sort. I think the good weather helped, as well as having really delicious homemade food to eat. And getting adequate sleep, although I do need to be better about going to bed early on Sunday nights for the rest of the term I think. Now I’m snuggled up with the little dog, my heating pad, and a book not related to school at all with plans to be asleep in less than an hour.

Some things I’m thinking about as I move into the next 265(6) days of this project:

• More time away from the internet
• More time in the sunshine/spent outside
• More cooking and good food
• More quality, intentional, grounding friend time
• Prioritizing sleep
• Prioritizing my time in general/not compromising what matters most to me
• More witchy woo spiritual practice happening
• More kink/leather exploration
• Moving! and creating my dream home with my plp, Wyatt
• Continuing to love myself. every. single. day.

day 95.

Today instead of having my usual epic self-care Wednesday, I spent some time supporting a dear friend of mine going through a tough time. It felt important to be there for her and her partner in that way. My friendships mean the world to me, and it feels good to be in a place where I can lend support without feeling like I am stretching myself too thin. I’m such a giver, and a caretaker, because that’s just what I do, but sometimes it’s to my detriment. Again, prioritizing self-care these past few months has really helped me become more aware of what I can and cannot give. And that feels really good to know.

day 94.

Made an amazing diner for myself, with enough leftovers for lunches for the rest of the week. One of the things I’m going to work hard on for the next month is cooking more. I realized that cooking for myself was one of the first things to go out the window when school and work got to be too much. I ate out so much last quarter, and spent a lot of money doing so. I know that I do have to cut myself some slack here and there, but it is one of those things that I’m really going to work on, especially since cooking is so grounding for me.

day 93.

Today I called out of work due to getting back home super late Sunday night/this morning. There was no way I was going to be able to be present and function, and I had some serious conference drop I needed to take care of.

I also started my new quarter of school today. Holy shit. It’s going to be hard. I’m going to spend the next few days formulating a plan to get through it while staying sane and still prioritizing self-care. March felt so much like just getting by day-by-day and I want to be more proactive going into this more difficult quarter. I have some ideas, I just need to flesh it out a bit.